Oh logical reasoning, where art thou?
This blog I start with a disclaimer.. this is more of a monologue to make me see logic.. This is a generic blog about how guilt invariably creeps into most of our activities as our personal lives become more enriching. I genuinely mean the enriched here. I enjoy being a daughter and a sister.. then came the role of a wife.. loved it loving it.. life got better.. welcome motherhood... life is truly happier.. the level of impact this person can have on you is something I never knew could happen. All this on one side, as things get better, busier, somehow from somewhere comes this uninvited guest: GUILT. I don't just mean the I am a working mother and am not doting on my son every second of our existence guilt. That ofcourse forms a significant part of it. I mean the guilt of multi tasking.
It is always our own decision to take up the roles we take up. Then why the second thought, especially the second thoughts which have no material impact. We have all taken decisions that we ve had to reverse. That's normal. So why feel guilty about any decision? In Utopia I would not mix my roles. When I am spending time as a mother I don't doubt the effectiveness of my other roles. When I reach office, I don't worry if my son is eating well, sleeping well. When I leave office I don't feel like I am sneaking out cos hey there are others still at work. When I read a book I don't feel like I could be cleaning my home and when I am cleaning my home I don't feel like I could be reading a book. Well but then it's called Utopia for a reason.
From what I hear motherhood especially comes packed with these doubts.What is actually the root cause of all these doubts? It's very easy to blame the society for the guilt. The society expects something from me is a disciplining statement I am putting to yself based on My perception of the society. This basically means I am trying to guilt myself into this doesn't it? Wouldn't it simply be easier to acknowledge and thank the people who are helping me take up these roles and truly focus on the moment I am in? Logically yes, but practically quite a task! Well here s hoping that this logical point of view somehow engraved itself in my head and anyone else who is going through the guilt attacks now n then :)
It is always our own decision to take up the roles we take up. Then why the second thought, especially the second thoughts which have no material impact. We have all taken decisions that we ve had to reverse. That's normal. So why feel guilty about any decision? In Utopia I would not mix my roles. When I am spending time as a mother I don't doubt the effectiveness of my other roles. When I reach office, I don't worry if my son is eating well, sleeping well. When I leave office I don't feel like I am sneaking out cos hey there are others still at work. When I read a book I don't feel like I could be cleaning my home and when I am cleaning my home I don't feel like I could be reading a book. Well but then it's called Utopia for a reason.
From what I hear motherhood especially comes packed with these doubts.What is actually the root cause of all these doubts? It's very easy to blame the society for the guilt. The society expects something from me is a disciplining statement I am putting to yself based on My perception of the society. This basically means I am trying to guilt myself into this doesn't it? Wouldn't it simply be easier to acknowledge and thank the people who are helping me take up these roles and truly focus on the moment I am in? Logically yes, but practically quite a task! Well here s hoping that this logical point of view somehow engraved itself in my head and anyone else who is going through the guilt attacks now n then :)
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